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How To Stress Less and Smile More
Stress has become an epidemic in our modern society with more
than two-thirds of visits to doctors' surgeries being for
stress-related illnesses. While a certain amount of stress is
needed to motivate individuals into action, prolonged stress can
have a huge impact on overall health. Stress has been linked to
headaches, backaches, insomnia, anger, cramps, elevated blood
pressure, chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromyalgia and lowered
resistance to infection. For women, stress is a key factor in
hormonal imbalances resulting in menstrual irregularities, PMS,
fibroids, endometriosis and fertility problems. Stress can also
be a factor in the development of almost all disease states
including cancer and heart disease; the leading cause of death
in Australian women.
More often than not stress is a result of letting our life get
out of balance. This happens by putting all our energy into only
one or two areas of our life (usually work) and ignoring the
rest. We overload our plate of life that high, things begin to
drop off and these are usually the things that are important to
us like time for our own interests and time we spend with our
family. We take on too much, over promise, don't delegate and
push our own wants and needs into the background.
So what can you do? How can you restore your balance so as to
stress less and smile more?
Step One: Practice extreme self-care Most people suffering
stress have become quite good at practising extreme
self-neglect! They don't eat well, rarely exercise or take
timeout and probably can't remember the last time they had a
holiday. The first thing that needs to be done is to become
'extreme' about your self-care. I'm not talking about jumping of
cliffs or skydiving (unless this is what you consider timeout)
but I am talking about the principle of extreme, that of taking
your self-care to new heights, above and beyond 'your' normal
limit. When we truly care for our own needs first, we build a
reserve of energy and resources that enables us to sustain
extreme self-care in our own life with enough left over to care
for others.
A great place to start is by creating ten delightful daily
habits. These habits include all the things that bring us
enjoyment and delight. What are some daily habits that we could
perform? Here are some suggestions.
* Stretch for 2 minutes. * Laugh for 5 minutes * Floss your
teeth * Read to your children * Hug a loved one * Go for a 10
minute walk in the park * Listen to your favourite song * Write
in a journal * Eat 3 fruit and 5 veg * Read a chapter of your
favourite book * Drink 2 litres of water * Going to bed early
The key to benefiting from your daily habits and practising
extreme self-care is to do just that, make them "daily" habits.
Start with one of your habits and commit to practicing it for
seven days then add another habit and practice them both for
another seven days. Continue this way until you are practicing
all ten items on your list daily.
Step Two: Eliminate your tolerations. Tolerations are things you
are putting up with that drain you physically, mentally,
emotionally or spiritually. They include things like crossed
boundaries, unfinished business or projects, others bad
behaviour, frustrations, unwanted commitments as well as things
like clutter, mess, broken items, being over weight, weeds in
the garden, debt and so on. Start by making a list of 5 things
that are driving you nuts about your job, life, health, home etc
and then devise a plan to get rid of the first thing on your
list this week. Notice how this makes you feel, how it lifts a
weight off your shoulders. Now think about how much better you
will feel when you get rid of the other 4 things on your list!!
When you've completed your list, start a new one and keep
working until you have zero tolerations in your life.
Step Three: Get your needs met! We all have personal needs that
when met make us feel satisfied and complete. Unmet needs cause
us to become upset, angry, stressed and depressed. The key to
satisfying our personal needs is to identify them. Identify
needs that feel true, not ones that look good or are
superficial. You need to be careful that what you consider to be
a need (e.g. to
Associated Websites
be loved) is not covering a true need
(self-esteem). Ideas of personal needs are:
* Calmness * Freedom * Be listened to * Independence * Feel
valued * Stability * Respect * A life purpose * Satisfying work
* Honesty * Loyalty * Be busy * Security * Be loved * Balance *
Responsibility * A career * Children
You may need to tell others what your needs are and learn to
ask for support.
Step Four: Smile often and laugh more! Scientists have found
that laughter stimulates the release of beneficial brain
neurotransmitters and hormones, which can reduce stress, improve
our immune system and give us a general sense of wellbeing. Some
doctors are using laughter therapy to replace anti-depressants
and to reduce the use of painkillers. According to researchers
faking laughter will also produce the same health and wellbeing
results as real laughter.
Do you need to improve your ability to laugh more? Well here
are some tips from Family Scientist, Herbert G. Lingren to help
all of you, who are humour impaired, to add laughter and humour
to your everyday life. 1. Hang around funny friends, or better
yet, marry a funny partner. 2. Start looking for the absurd,
silly, incongruous activities that go on around you each day. 3.
Take a 5-10 minute humour break each day. Read jokes, add to a
humour notebook, and listen to a funny tape. 4. Rent a comedy
video, go to a funny movie, and watch humorous programs on
television. 5. If you hear a joke you really like, write it
down, or tell it to someone else to help you remember it.
Step Five: Set Goals Without goals we have no direction in
life. We are lost! When we are lost we get stressed and
overwhelmed. Goals are a tool we can use to have what we want
and need in our personal and professional life.
When you set a goal, it tells your subconscious mind what is
important to you and to be on the lookout for things, people,
opportunities or situations that will enable you to move towards
your goal. Goals help us navigate our life with greater ease and
reaching goals can make our life more fulfilling and happier.
One way to find out what your real goals are is to write a list
of 100 things you'd like to accomplish before you die and then
start working on your list today!
Step Six: Create a supportive environment Our surroundings can
be supportive and give us energy or drag us down and leave us
stressed and tired. Surrounding ourself with inspiring, fun,
positive things and people can energize us and add joy to our
life. We need good support structures to effortlessly flow
through life and remain balanced.
We can break our life support structures into five basic
categories:
1. People-family, friends, life coach, accountant, doctor,
housekeeper etc. 2. Places-your office, desk, car, home 3.
Things-your phone, computer, home decor 4. Processes-filing
system, record keeping, time management program, 5. Inner
Environment- your outlook on life, self-esteem level, thought
processes
Examine the above five categories and look at who or what you
use to support you in each area. Are you truly being supported?
What do you need to change to feel more supported in all areas
of your life? Start making the easiest changes first.
Just as it can take to time end up stressed, overwhelmed and
out of balance, it also takes time to make positive changes in
your life. Sometimes trying to implement change (even for the
better) can itself cause stress and prevent a person remaining
motivated.
Work on one step at a time until you master that step in your
life and then move on to the next area you need to change. If
you can't do it on your own get support from a counsellor,
doctor, naturopath, friend, peer or life coach who specializes
in stress issues.
Above all remember the benefits you will feel when you've
mastered the steps to stress less and smile more!
About the author:
"Lisa Branigan is a certified Life Coach helping successful
women create a less pressured, more enjoyable lifestyle" She is
a speaker, writer, regular radio guest and contributor to
magazines and newspapers. Email: lisa@quantumcoaching.com.au
Website: http://www.quantumcoaching.com.au/
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